Delia was trying to tell herself Marcus was all right. He was nice, he seemed to care for her, her parents liked him... but still, even as she was holding hands with him and doing her best to woo him, something was holding her back.
She knew she needed to marry him - him or anyone else, but who else was there, really - before the baby was born or even started showing too much. She didn't need her mother's constant disapproving or worried looks to tell her that. But still she couldn't make herself to say the words out loud. She didn't have much time, but she still found herself stalling, giving Marcus backrubs so that he wouldn't see her face, and waiting for him to ask the question himself.

Her parents, on the other hand, were maybe too enthusiastic. Alysanne was her sweetest self, baking for Marcus, treating him like family already and generally just falling all over herself to please him. And Tomas was so cheerful and friendly that one would think he wanted to marry Marcus himself. Delia knew they were worried, they were only trying to be helpful, but she couldn't help feeling somehow embarrassed. Their help was just as annoying as their disapproval and she couldn't wait to get away from them.
Didn't they trust Adrian to take care of her?

And still, there were moments when it doesn't seem all that bad.
Her romance had been sweet and wonderful, but she had to face the facts, however painful. Adrian was married, he might give her love, he might even give her money, but he would never give her a home or family. And she wanted those, genuinely wanted for herself, not just because her parents were pushing her into their way of life.
There were moments when Marcus was holding her in his arms and she felt secure and wasn't that important as well? In these moments she thought that home and family were maybe more important than romantic passion.
If only Marcus would propose soon.

Throughout all this, Devin had been doing his best not to get in anyone's way. His sister was in trouble, his parents were worried and he didn't want to add more problems to the family heap. He was so successful in being invisible, it came to him so naturally, that for those weeks it was like he didn't exist at all.
When his birthday came, he didn't really expect anything and the party caught him completely by surprise. Alysanne baked a cake, complete with candles, and Tomas brought noisemakers and excitement which Devin hadn't seen directed at him since what seemed like forever. It was like something from a different world and seeing so much attention was strange and reassuring at the same time.
Delia, her belly already huge, urged him to blow out his candles and make a wish, but Devin had no idea what he wanted. He hesitated, glancing around the room. Everyone was looking at him with anticipation, their faces warm and happy.
Devin blew out the candles and wished for everyone to stay this happy forever. He wished for Delia to marry her sweetheart, their parents to have no more worries and everyone to love each other like they did now.

Soon Delia's belly got too big for her to leave the house without everyone staring at her. Marcus didn't propose and everyone tried to tell themselves it could still turn out all right. They could get married later, Marcus could adopt the fatherless baby... uncle Dorian suggested just giving the baby away, to the convent if nobody wanted to adopt it, but Delia flatly refused. Even when Damien tried to persuade her not to give up her carefree life, even when Adrian tried to argue it would be the easiest and safest solution of "the situation", as he called it, Delia could not imagine parting with the new life that was growing inside of her. Even the words, "her baby", sounded to her like a miracle and she couldn't wait to hold it in her arms.
She was completely unprepared for the pain, though. When the contractions started, she at first thought something was wrong, she was ill, maybe even going to die.

It took hours, Alysanne doing her best to coach her daughter and the boys just watching, more worried with each hour that passed. Delia screamed and pushed, pushed and screamed, until it was finally over.

She was exhausted, but holding the tiny baby, her newborn son, poured new energy into her. "He's perfect. He looks just like his father..."
"You shouldn't say that." Alysanne interrupted her daughter's reverie, her voice gentle but firm. "Nobody must know who his father is, ever. Nobody must guess." She remembered far too well what ruined her father, what the end of his life looked like. She wouldn't bear for her daughter to suffer the same fate and too many people knew about lord Adrian's affair with her already. If lady Ellara ever found out...

But Delia found it hard to care about Ellara or much of the outside world. Her baby son was real and focusing all her attention. She felt she had finally found something to ground her and give her life meaning. But at the same time she found it hard to forget Adrian, to look at her son's perfect face and not see his father in Edric's features.
At first she just wanted to show Adrian the baby, but it was too easy to reignite the romance. Delia didn't really know how exactly it happened, but soon everything was just like in the carefree days before the baby, despite her parents' silent disapproval.

Delia was so happy with her baby and easy romance, that she completely forgot about Marcus and the desperate courtship she had been forced into. But Marcus had not forgotten her.
He had been thinking hard during since he had last seen her. He couldn't miss her pregnancy, despite all the effort she had put into hiding it, but he had decided to forgive her. If she was truly sorry for her transgression, as she seemed to be, he would take her with the baby, maybe even adopt the child so that everything would look respectable. And he would enjoy all the gratitude that he rightly deserved. And then they could be truly happy, all thanks to his generosity.
It all seemed perfect, and perfectly natural and when he walked up to her door he was already imagining his future life with his loving wife.

He didn't even knock before going right in, already feeling at home. But what he saw behind the door broke his vision into a thousand pieces. There was Delia, the girl he had almost agreed to marry, in a passionate embrace with somebody else. He watched in disbelief when the man kissed her in such a way Marcus had never seen before. She should have been kissing his feet and instead she...!
Marcus could only stare, all his love and pity for her evaporating in that instant.

Before he even realised what he was doing, he rushed to the girl and slapped her, and then again and again, screaming something about betrayal and lies and about never wanting to see her again.

Delia's first reaction was to snap something suitably cutting back. Only after the words "I have never wanted you anyway" were out of her mouth did she realise what she had done. Deep down it may have been true, but... a quick look around the house told her that Adrian had quietly disappeared, probably worried Marcus would recognise him - if he hadn't already - and tell his ghastly wife.
The realisation that she was alone, that Adrian wouldn't - couldn't? - fight for her was maybe even harder than the utter disgust she could read in Marcus' face, but what was the worst was the feeling of utter helplessness.

Delia ran after Marcus as he walked out of the door.
"Please... please, I didn't mean that... I didn't mean any of that, please, just let me explain!"
She took hold of his sleeve and tugged it, desperate to stop him, to make him listen to her. He tore himself from her grasp as if her hand was red-hot, but at least stopped. He turned to look at her, his features hard and his eyes still full of disgust, and Delia realised she had no idea what she wanted to say.
She did her best, but she was only able to stammer excuses that sounded weak and empty even to her ears. She watched Marcus shake his head slowly and pleaded even more, but it was clear nothing she could say would change his mind.

And then her mother was there. Alysanne invited Marcus for fresh bread, led him back into the house and listened patiently to him ranting. Delia didn't dare follow them. She was too scared of attracting attention.
When she dared peek through a window her mother and Marcus were still talking, he looked much calmer than before, and she seemed to be explaining or maybe suggesting something. Was there still hope?

But then Delia remembered how Marcus had looked at her just a few moments before and all the hope transformed back into anger. She was just thinking about how happy she was she never needed to see Marcus and his self-important face again when her mother called her back inside.
She walked in frowning and with her arms crossed, defiance hiding her uncertainty and fear.
"Your mother says you had no choice but to agree to your lord's advances. Is this true?" Marcus wasted no time with pleasantries before asking, his tone still cold even if most of his anger seemed to be gone. "I suppose being just a girl..."
Delia almost laughed before she managed to stop herself. The idea was just so absurd, Adrian would never have forced her into anything, as if he would ever need to!
"What? Do you really think...?"
Marcus didn't even let her finish. "So that's another lie? I should have known. With your family's reputation it would have been a miracle if you had turned any different. Forget it. Forget everything."
Delia caught her mother's look of pained disappointment. "Wait! Wait, it's true! Yes, he...!"
But Marcus was already gone before she could finish the lie.

Delia expected to be punished, but nothing happened. For a while she thought this nothing was worse than if she had been punished, her parents' disappointment was clear and their sadness even more so. Tomas lost his enthusiasm again and replaced his jokes with more work. And Alysanne was quiet and seemed resigned to all the bad luck life would bring.
But then she got used to things being what they were. Her baby son was demanding attention and Delia was happy to have him. At least Edric loved her unconditionally and only wanted her love and care.

And he never judged her and never imposed society's standards on her. Her mother never seemed to be thinking about anything else. First she worried about Marcus going to lady Ellara and when that didn't happen she switched to worrying about Delia's ruined marital prospects, but mostly she seemed to worry just for the sake of worrying.
Delia went with her to church every day - she didn't dare refuse - but when she prayed, it was for freedom to live her life her own way.

Anselm and Leandra spent their days in easy harmony. Even Ellara, so opposed to having a younger lady Lorimer usurp her place of power, stopped most of her efforts to make their life difficult after she realised it was a waste of energy. IT wasn't peace, not really, but even an uneasy truce was good when it meant not having to see Ellara most days. Life was good.
Until Anselm fell seriously ill. Leandra spent whole days at his bedside, trying to soothe his fever, but nothing helped.

As doctors came and went and Anselm grew weaker with every day, Leandra turned to folk remedies and rumours, anything that could possibly help. She was willing to try everything, but she had less support in her efforts than she would have expected.
"Bringing in a commoner? An adulteress, a criminal's daughter? Have you lost your mind?"
Leandra flinched from the poison in Ellara's voice. She was too exhausted to fight, to tell the other woman she had no real authority over the matters. "I heard she knows a healing recipe..." She said weakly. "People in the village..."
"So now we listen to the people in the village? Which kind, the stupid ignorant fools or the criminals and troublemakers?"
Leandra wanted to say she had first heard of Alysanne's soup from Adrian, Leandra's own husband, but before she could open her mouth Ellara continued:
"Nothing good has ever come from the common people and I won't allow one of them to touch my nephew. And especially not one of that family!"
After that, the young lady just turned and left. She didn't need Ellara's permission and there must be a way to sneak Alysanne into the manor without her interference.

But before she could send for her, her husband's condition worsened so much that she didn't dare leave his side even for a moment. When he died, she had not slept for at least three nights.
The strange cold in the room, just after Anselm drew his last breath could be just her exhaustion, but then Leandra thought she glimpsed a dark shape standing over Anselm's bed. It was hard to see through her tears, but still the dark figure with a scythe seemed too clear to be a hallucination. And even if it was a hallucination, she had nothing to lose. She fell on her knees before the apparition, trying to plead for her loved one's life and not finding the words that would fully express her heart.

She didn't really know what to expect, probably didn't expect anything, but when a voice spoke up inside her head telling her to gamble for Anselm's soul, she almost thought she must be dreaming after all. But if there was even a tiny chance that she wasn't...
With great effort she got up to her feet and forced herself to concentrate on the two bony hands presented before her. One of them would hold her husband's soul. Just find the right one and they can be happy again.
She bit her lip, muttered a quick prayer to the Watcher and pointed with trembling hand.

And then the chosen hand opened, revealing nothing but air between its bare bony fingers. Leandra sank back to her knees, just barely sensing that the Grim Reaper raised his scythe, not even caring if it meant to take her soul also.

That was how the servants found her much later, still collapsed on the floor next to her husband, blinded with tears and mumbling something incoherent about dark shapes, souls and the world beyond.
"If I can find his soul he can return, but it's gone now. I wonder what would give me a second try...?"

Leandra spent the next few days bedridden and mostly out of touch with reality. When Desmond, Ellara's only son and the only heir to the Lorimer estate, fell ill as well, she didn't even notice, completely lost in her own grief.
Only when Desmond finally died did she break out of her lethargy at to at least attend the double funeral, but she was still too deep into her own personal tragedy to fully realise the state of the family.
The lord was dead, without a living child, and there was no apparent heir to carry his legacy.

Around the same time, Anna was feeling ill as well, if for a completely different reason. She had been hiding the morning sickness, hoping against all hope she was not expecting yet another child. But when the sickness refused to go away, she was slowly forced to admit at least to herself that something was wrong.
It wasn't anything she could put her finger on. It was too early for her to feel the baby, she even kept telling herself maybe it wasn't a pregnancy at all, but still somehow she knew.
Just like she somehow knew that the baby was dead.

She had never wanted another child, she had not really planned or even wanted any of her previous two children either, but there was still something so final about losing it. Anna suddenly felt empty, almost dead inside, her whole world cold and grey.
Damien had no idea what was going on and Anna was sure he wouldn't understand if she told him. She didn't doubt that he loved her, but he was too carefree, too childlike to understand this kind of loneliness.

She spent the next few days after the miscarriage under black clouds, sleepwalking through her life without noticing much. But when she finally emerged from the worst darkness, there was a living child waiting for her and needing her care.
It was like her whole world had been turned on its head. She was still mourning the dead baby she never got to know, but little Elena's unconditional love was just as strong and just as unexpected as the sorrow, and it was leading Anna back into the light.

Not everyone was happy with this new-found relationship, though. Tristan, who had never been coddled by his parents and by then had completely stopped expecting it, didn't enjoy seeing his baby sister getting in generous quantities something he never had.
He mostly took out his frustration on Elena, hiding her toys - why did she need so many, anyway! - taunting her and pinching her when nobody was looking. Some part of him hoped that if he made her cry often enough, his mother would grow annoyed with the baby again. But even though that didn't happen, it made him feel better every time something didn't go exactly as he would have liked.

And there were many things that didn't go well at all.
Tristan had never enjoyed school, only tolerating it as a means to make friends. But now most of other kids mostly ignored him and even his relationship with lord Adrian didn't help any more. Tristan didn't really understand why he still bothered attending. His grades were slipping and he had no idea how to stop them, how to at least get them to a level that wouldn't make other kids laugh at him.
It was just so annoying, despite the fact that neither of his parents really cared about his learning.

Weeks turned into months, but lady Leandra still visited her husband's grave every day. There, alone in the cold winter graveyard she felt better and more at ease than back in the cold, almost empty mansion. At first she wanted to feel closer to where her was, buried in Anselm's coffin, but then it became much more. There were times when she was sure Anselm could hear her speaking to him, that he could see the baby that was growing inside her.
She imagined what the child would be like, eyes just like Anselm's, the same warm smile. With no friends of her own and living next to lady Ellara, bitter and always angry, this was the best comfort Leandra had, the thing that helped her get out of her bed every morning.

Ellara was feeling bitter for more reasons than the recent deaths in the family. She hated people fussing over poor, grieving, pregnant Leandra even more than she had hated her take charge of the manor. She hated seeing Leandra pregnant, especially when she knew her own days of bearing children were over. She hated the idea that the future of the family, all the power, should be out of her hands.
She was doing her best to hide her age, but that didn't stop her from feeling it every time she looked into a mirror. Every single grey hair was an unwelcome reminder until there was no black left on her head.

As the birth of the child grew closer, air at the manor grew both nervous and hopeful at the same time. Everyone was hoping for a son to continue the Lorimer line, but when the baby came, it was a girl.
Ellara was feeling vindicated. When her heir was dead, her rival had no right to bear one either. Leandra herself hardly noticed the general disappointment all around her. All she cared about was that the baby was healthy, a real person ready to receive all her love.
She was still heartbroken, but little Nadine brought her at least some hope for the future.

Meanwhile, little Elena was growing fast.
If Tristan hoped their mother would grow tired of the baby, he was disappointed. Elena continued to beam, quickly catching up on everything she had not learned earlier. Anna was glued to her daughter and seemed so happy that it was almost making Tristan sick.

Elena's birthday was a shining example. Anna baked a cake for the occasion, something she had never done before, with candles for Elena to blow out. Tristan felt completely ignored, put aside because of that stupid little girl who could only wail and hog everyone's attention. He wasn't surprised his father had skipped the celebration, only annoyed he had not taken him as well.
He tried to get Anna's attention, steal at least a few moments from the stupid baby, but it was like he was completely invisible.

"Did you make a wish? What did you ask for, a knight in shining armour? A castle? Everyone treats you like a princess anyway!"
Tristan tried to sound grown-up-mean, make his sister feel bad for the treatment she was receiving, but Elena just kept staring at her piece of cake. Ignoring him, just like everyone else.

In memory of Queen Sunni

Sunni, the Gracious Monarch of Plumb Bob Keep has passed away and will be missed by the whole community which she has so deeply touched. Sunni was our light and our inspiration and she will live on forever in our hearts and in her wonderous creations.

Rest in pace, Sunni.

Ever since the night they were caught, Delia had been keeping her head low. It wasn't like she had any choice, with how her parents were watching her, there were times when she felt less free that if she had been sentenced to prison. But there were other times when she had to admit that in some respects at least, they were right. She had been lucky and she definitely didn't want to end up like her friend had. But while Delia more or less wanted to wait until everything blew over, even if she was unsure about anything after that, Finn was much less willing to just forget everything.
She supposed she should have been happy to see him. But when Finn strode into her house one day, his face angry and determined, Delia's main emotion was shock. She flinched even before Finn could start shouting at her, something about a betrayal and setting him up.

"I haven't... I would never... I was punished too!" She managed to say, but was as if he didn't even hear her.
"I just can't believe you can be this slow and clumsy and not be doing it on purpose. And I didn't see you get punished."
"But...!"
And then he was on top of her, smacking her, impossible to hold away no matter how she tried. It all happened too fast for her to even cry for help before the blows stopped and Finn was out of the door again.

She ran after him without thinking.
"Wait...! I thought we were friends?" At that moment she completely forgot she was forbidden to even speak with Finn, other than just a tiny thought in the back of her head that it was lucky her parents were out. She just couldn't believe he would blame her, reject her so utterly.
"Not any more. I'm not friends with traitors and friends of village guards."
With that, Finn turned and walked away, with Delia just looking after him, feeling hurt. And she couldn't even tell her parents.

Days turned into weeks. Delia withdrew into herself, hoping to piece her life together again in solitude. Everything had gotten so complicated she couldn't find her way anymore and she didn't even know what she wanted.
She envied her baby brother, who seemed to have it so easy. Everyone loved him, school was easier for him than it had ever been for Delia, and their parents cheered him every step of the way. It was as if he didn't even have to try and it seemed completely unfair.

When Delia's eighteenth birthday came, she couldn't really care less. She watched her mother bake a special birthday cake for her and prepare everything, but it was as if it didn't really concern her. She didn't see any reason to celebrate.
The celebration itself felt as unreal as the preparations. Her parents were urging her to make a wish, but she had no idea how to put one into words. It seemed that all her wishes so far had brought only disasters, even when fulfilled. Especially when fulfilled. "What would be the point?" she asked with a shrug.
"Sweetie... what's wrong?" Her mother asked in a quiet voice that sounded whiny to Delia's ears. Her father just stared while Devin, the happy child who had everything easy, continued cheering obliviously.
Delia felt like she wanted to scream.

In the end she wasn't sure how exactly she managed to endure it. The cheering, the stupid smiles, the pretending everything was fine and everyone should be happy. She wasn't happy and hated having to pretend, but she knew she would hate the inevitable questions even more.
Only when the celebration was over and everyone finally stopped paying attention to her could she let go. She collapsed on the floor, too exhausted even to cry. She was an adult now, but she had no idea what it should mean for her, no idea what to do. In a way, she envied her parents. No matter their past, they had each other. Delia had no one and felt utterly alone.

It wasn't until after a few days spent under a dark cloud that she remembered one person who had not forsaken her yet.
Ever since that first time he spoke to her, Adrian had been more than attentive to her, making her feel like a princess whenever he was around. With him, she felt beautiful, important and wanted. and, most of all, not alone. Could it be anything else than the fairy-tale romance it seemed?

With nobody else to turn to and her uncle Damien encouraging her, Delia put everything in this secret love affair. Every day she would smile for her parents, just going through the motions of the daily chores and waiting for the evening. And then, after everyone else was fast asleep, she would get in the carriage Adrian sent for her and enter a completely different life.

When she was in her lover's arms, nothing else in the world seemed to matter. Her future may still have been uncertain, but at least she didn't have to think about it anymore. Why should she care, when she could lose herself in the belief that her lover would take care of her, that he would carry her if need be?

Those nights were like a dream. Before, at uncle Damien's house, Adrian had been attentive and romantic. Now, when they were alone under the stars, he proved to be much more.
And even as the weather was growing colder, their nights were as pleasant as ever. Adrian's embrace was always warm and when that wasn't enough on its own, they always had a hot springs in the woods or Adrian's comfortable tent.

Those nights were outside of normal time and they might have continued for ever, but time always has its ways to force itself back in view.
When Delia first started feeling ill, she thought nothing of it and tried to ignore her uneasy stomach for as long as she could. She didn't want to even think about the possibility of being pregnant, but after some time no other explanation made sense.

Still, she did her best to close her eyes and almost made herself forget before her belly grew too much to easily hide. Only this, a completely undeniable physical change, made her fully realise what was going to happen.

She was still trying to get used to the idea and figure out a way to deal with this unexpected change, when her mother found out her secret. Alysanne had no idea how it had happened, but that only made her more worried.
"What were you thinking? What would everyone say when they see you? Who is the father? The criminal you were going out with?"
No matter how scared she might have been herself, this attack put Delia immediately on the defensive. And the mention of Finn made her feel even worse, bringing back memories and feelings of embarrassment and shame, disappointment and irritation.
"No! I haven't seen Finn in ages, just like you made me promise!" The name left a bitter taste in her mouth. She missed her former friend and rejected him at the same time. "And I don't care what people will say. It's not their baby. They're all stupid anyway!"
"Delia!"
She wanted to laugh at how shocked her mother looked, how narrow-minded. "It's not like caring about other people has brought you much luck."
Silence. Delia took the opportunity to storm out of the house and out of her mother's sight, enjoying her victory. She did her best not to think about the future.

The next few days were quiet and icy cold. She had refused to tell her parents the name of the baby's father. She could imagine their reaction just too well and didn't want to hear anything about the dangers of dealing with the aristocracy. They would never understand and she didn't really want them to anyway. Those nights with Adrian were hers and hers alone, she didn't want to ruin those memories by letting them torn down by her parents.
Still, when her mother insisted on a hasty wedding, she was slowly forced to accept the idea. She didn't care about the society, but at least it would allow her to move away from her parents.
But even if she was willing to marry - who? Her fairytale prince was already married, Finn was out of the question even if he wasn't still angry at her, not to mention he would probably laugh at the idea of marriage. And when her her mother mentioned Marcus, she didn't know who she was talking about for a few moments. Still, she supposed there was no one else and certainly no one better. And when she invited Marcus over and tried to act as nice as possible towards him, he seemed flattered and happy. And he didn't ask for her reason.

Days passed and everything seemed to be going well with Marcus. Whatever they had between each other was even starting to resemble a real relationship. But Delia still couldn't help feeling strange about it all. Here she was, trying her best to make this man marry her, while she felt she didn't even know him. While deeply in love with someone else, who she could never have. Still, was there any other choice?
And as she continued flirting with Marcus, even when they were supposed to be alone, completely private, Delia could feel the eyes of her parents on her and her belly. Her baby was growing much faster than she would have liked and she was sure Marcus must notice soon. And what would he do then?

When Alysanne heard that Alvin, her oldest friend, had died, it felt like the final straw to break the illusion of her good life. The fact that they had not spoken in years didn't help, if anything, it made her feel even worse.
When she stood above his grave, after everyone else had left , she felt old. helpless and strangely lonely.

That night she couldn't sleep and instead spent it staring at the stars, thinking about the life that could have been and the uncertain future. She wondered if it was really possible to see the future in the stars, as she had once thought with Alvin. But if anything was written in the night sky, she couldn't read it.